Throughout my career, I’ve been involved in many negotiations, both in real estate and in general full-time job circumstances. In this article, I'll share three negotiating tactics that were used against me and worked. But don't worry, I'm not here to scare you! I just want to give you some pointers so you can be better prepared for your next negotiation.

They are so damn likable.

Problem: Do you find it tough to negotiate against someone you really like? It can be awkward at first because you may not want to offend them, but there’s some serious business that needs to be addressed.

Solution: Stick to the facts. Facts are emotionless. They do not contain trigger phrases like “this is unacceptable,” “but it’s not fair,” “but I’ve worked really hard on this,” “but I’ve been here so long,” or curse words. When you maintain a calculated and logical approach to the negotiation, your stance cannot be disputed.

They demonstrate they have more knowledge on the topic than you (and gray hair helps)

Problem: The opposition may have more experience in the industry, more knowledge about the topic, and may be older. When they talk, it’s clear they know more about the topic than you do. This can be a daunting situation.

Solution: Align yourself with people who have the knowledge and experience you lack, and bring them in to actively participate with you. If that’s not possible, dismiss any irrelevant information and focus only on the outcome. Think of yourself going 1000 mph and all the stuff they are saying are the blurry objects. They might say a lot of stuff, but only focus on the info that will get you to your outcome. It requires concentration, but it works.

They devalue your contribution (e.g. payment, time, thoughts)

Problem: The opposition may undervalue your contribution and indicate that they are losing money on the deal. However, they still go through with the transaction and somehow stay in business and are happy with the outcome.

Solution: Create a list of five reasons why the opposition should do the deal. This helps you understand from their perspective why it is favorable. You can choose to bring up those points or just keep them in your head. Regardless, remind yourself of the value you’re bringing to the table. They wouldn’t be having this conversation with you if they didn’t agree you bring value. Whether it’s money or time, you are adding tremendous value to this arrangement, and don’t let them tell you otherwise.

What are some negotiating tactics that you’ve seen work?